Day 8 Lenten Journal/Journey

As the sun melts into the horizon, Anne gazes into Gilbert's eyes and says, "I don't want diamond sunbursts, or marble halls. I just want you."

I always cheer at this point—the last line of the movie, Anne of Green Gables: The Sequel. Anne's profession of love to Gilbert finally settles years of heart wrenching turbulence during which Gilbert's advances are either ignored or outright rejected. I never tire of the film series, each time bemoaning Anne's refusals of Gilbert (knowing full well she will accept him in the end), rooting for the determined suitor, and basically enjoying the whole tortuous, tumultuous process.

After watching the movies as a young girl, I daydreamed about having my own romance full of tender looks and pulse-racing emotion. I wondered who my "Gilbert"   would be and how our breathtaking love story would unfold. But my "romantic" experience turned out different from what I envisioned. In fact, it didn't feel romantic at all.

It began in April of 1990. I'd just graduated from college and started a new job. I was taken downstairs to meet my new staff. Two men walked out of the banquet kitchen towards my office. When I turned to look, I gazed into a pair of heartrending blue eyes and suddenly heaven opened, a shaft of light beamed down, and background music swelled to a crescendo.

Daniel and I began a friendship as we shared many similar interests and of course a job. After about a year Mike was ready to  move to the dating stage, with visions of matrimony waltzing into the future. I, however, wasn't so ready. In fact when he asked to "talk" after the first five months, I struggled to fight back tears when I stated my desire to keep our relationship strictly platonic.

Because we ran in the same circles and worked together, we continued to see each other often. And the more time I spent near Mike, the more my heart was drawn to him. I'd never met anyone like him, and knew, without a doubt, that he was the man I wanted to marry. I also still sensed interest from him as well, both from what he said and from what his body language implied.

During the Christmas, all the long hours together working gave us a chance to talk for long periods of time. So after the holidays were over and we returned to a more normal schedule, he ask if we could talk, my heart leapt. This was it!

Or not. Even now I can remember the bitter taste in my mouth and the loud ticking of my wall clock after Mike finished his lengthy monologue with, "And I don't ever see us being anything more than friends." He left shortly afterward. I cried myself to sleep.

Fast forward a year and Mike was professing undying love and asking if I would spend the rest of my life with him. So, yes, it all worked out, but not without considerable pain and uncertainty. Prior to our hippie bonding, a young, single friend asked for a detailed account of our relationship, and after I told her the story, she wistfully sighed, "How romantic!"

I was stunned. Did she not hear the heartache within my tale? Did she not understand how painful love could be, even when it came to a good end?

I realized there's a difference between observing a so-called romance and actually living one. Romances don't always turn out the way we envision them.

We can trick ourselves into believing that a romance will always "feel" romantic (basically all those bubbly, yummy emotions), or that it will meet certain conscious or unconscious expectations. Even the romance-seeking Anne in Anne of Green Gables, became confused and required a "romance adjustment" from her guardian, Marilla.

When Marilla clued Anne into the fact that Gilbert loved her, Anne said, "Marilla, he's hardly my idea of a romantic suitor." In response Marilla said, "Anne, you have tricked something out of that imagination of yours that you call romance. Have you forgotten how he gave up the Avonlea school for you so that you could stay here with me? He picked you up every day in his carriage so that you could study your courses together. Don't toss it away for some ridiculous ideal that doesn't exist."

The sacrifices that Gilbert made out of his love for Anne didn't fit into Anne's concept of "romance." She envisioned a somewhat mysterious, wealthy, and heroic suitor who would win her heart with poetry. But Gilbert's every day kindnesses struck Anne as too ordinary to be romantic.

In the daily stuff of life, Anne missed Gilbert's repeated professions of love.

I think about how I do that with God, about how I forget that I live within a great romance where God is daily professing his love to me and to all people. Because a sunrise, or a flower (especially in a daisy, how in perfect it is, but all together it is beautiful), or the chirp of a bird seems so ordinary, I miss the romance of it all. And yet God, through everyday kindnesses is wooing us to him. He is saying, over and over again, "I love you! I love you! I love you!" Even those piles of laundry and stacks of dishes—are they not evidence of a passionate suitor providing for his love?

It is so easy to miss the romance, to trick ourselves into believing that life is a drudgery filled with endless duties. Or else we miss the romance because it doesn't make us feel warm and fuzzy inside.

God's romance is not without pain and heartache. But isn't that part of any great romance? Isn't the final uniting of two lovers that much sweeter when they've persevered through misunderstandings and trials? Do we not cheer all the louder because of the suffering they have endured?

I didn't know if Mike and I would end up together. And our journey  to be together was pretty rocky at times. But when I look back and say it was worth all the heartache for the joy we share.

A greater joy, beyond any we can imagine, awaits those who love and are loved by God. And unlike earthly romances, we know how God's romance with us will end! We know we will look back someday and say it was worth all the struggle and heartache

God, who is love, is the definitive romantic. He professes his love to us through countless "ordinary" ways. But if we let ourselves get "tricked out of romance" we will miss them! We must not allow our to-do lists to crowd out the awareness that we live within the greatest tale of love ever told.

How great? Consider that God chooses to love us every day, and not only does he choose to love us every day (even when we're unlovable), but he made the ultimate sacrifice by giving his own life to rescue us.

I don't know about you, but that's enough love to knock me off my feet. Forever. Now if only we can figured out why we are so blind to His love that is offered to us every second of our life. 

Day 8 of Lent

God Wants You to Succeed

We live in a world where everyone seems preoccupied with success. Television, the Internet, radio, and magazines give us a global bird’s-eye view of the world’s winners—and losers. And we’re fascinated by it, aren’t we? 

But what does it mean to succeed in life? Furthermore, given how the world reacts to successful people, and considering the negative ways that many people strive for personal achievement, is success even a godly pursuit? 

Let me answer that question right from the start: Yes. As followers of the Lord Jesus Christ, we are not only allowed to strive for success; we’re called to do so. God is overwhelmingly interested in our victories, but as sinful men and women, we often get confused about this issue. Therefore, we must begin by understanding a true and godly definition of success.

The world most often defines the term as simply one’s ability to achieve personal goals. For example, a football coach may consider himself to be a success if he wins every game. Or a college student may appear successful if she makes straight A’s. So it can be difficult to establish a definition that we can all agree on, because the measurement often depends on our individual goals.

Instead, we must ask the question, What is it that would make God see me as a success? You see, the world’s perspective fluctuates, but the Lord’s view is constant: to Him, my greatest achievement is a continuing desire to be the person He has called me to be and to reach the goals He has helped me to set.

 

Allow that statement to sink in for a moment. Read it again, this time out loud. Everything else I will say about success hangs on this one crucial point, so make sure you grasp it.

There are two critical elements in the statement. First, our success depends on being who God wants us to be. Second, it depends on doing what He calls us to do. In both areas, God is the focus. Our goal is to fully realize what He has set forth for us. Therefore, our victories ultimately belong to Him, and He deserves all the praise.

You cannot be successful if you leave the Lord out of your life. Now, by the world’s standard, you may appear to “have it all,” but what is the eternal value of fame and fortune? Certainly, there is nothing inherently wrong with these things, but we must overcome the notion that “FAME + FORTUNE = SUCCESS.” 

Money and celebrity cannot bring lasting peace, joy, love, contentment, and eternal security, which are available only through the love of God in Christ Jesus.

Does this mean that Christians can take their wealth with them when they leave this world? No, of course not. However, here’s the powerful truth: We do not need to take our treasure with us, because we have already sent it ahead. In seeking a life motivated by godly goals, we are already amassing a great treasure in heaven (Matt. 6:20-21). Therefore, our true worth will be measured by our eternal reward, not our earthly wealth.

You may ask, “Well, then, should we avoid material wealth?” No, not at all. However, we have to be crystal clear on one important point: Fame and fortune may be the external results of success, but they themselves are not success. Remember, success is not about what you have, but about what you are. In its purest sense, success is simply being the man or woman God has called you to be.

When we think of it this way, there is no doubt that God is interested in our success! Not only is He interested, but He intentionally encourages us to be triumphant. Scripture offers four proofs. 

First, God plans for us to succeed. We see this in the lives of many men and women in the Bible. For example, do you remember the story of Joseph in Genesis chapters 37-50? By the world’s standards, he was doomed from the start. The young Hebrew had been beaten and sold into slavery by his own brothers, and for years he lived a life of servitude and imprisonment. However, in everything Joseph did, God made him thrive.

In those important chapters of Genesis, we see Joseph as a shepherd boy, then a slave, later as a prisoner, and ultimately as the prime minister of Egypt! Surely God had planned for the faithful servant’s good fortune, even during those years when all seemed hopeless.

We see similar accounts throughout biblical history. Moses, David, Nehemiah, and Joshua all demonstrate this same kind of greater divine plan for distinction. And, of course, let’s not forget the apostles—they thrived in the first century and spread the good news of salvation around the world. No doubt, their mission must be considered a success, or we would have no churches or record of Jesus Christ at all.

In each of these examples, people discovered what the Lord wanted them to do, committed their lives to it, followed godly principles, and achieved their goals. In the eyes of God, they were all successful.

Second, God provides for our success. I have shelves of books on this topic, and I’ve yet to find an overriding principle of achievement that is not also found in God’s Word. The Bible contains every fundamental concept on success that I’ve ever read in any other book. Different authors may pluck an idea out of the Scriptures and write a book about it, but they didn’t create the principle.

Something I’ve often seen mentioned in these books is the utter need for faith. Now, some authors may say success depends on faith in one’s self, while others point to belief in some “higher power.” But as followers of Jesus Christ, we can name that source of our strength: almighty God, who cares for us. You see, God alone is the author of success. Without Him, a person will ultimately know only failure—and in the meantime, perishable wealth at best.

Third, God equips us for success. Because He calls us to be shining lights in a dark world, He has provided what we need in order to be successful men and women. For example, every believer has been given certain abilities, or spiritual gifts. These are amazing endowments that enable us to do the things that God calls us to do.

The Lord has also equipped us by giving every believer the presence of His indwelling Spirit. The Holy Spirit brings us into intimate contact with the heavenly Father, empowers our daily lives, teaches us the things of God, and gives us His discernment.

In the power of the Holy Spirit, we have access to supernatural decision-making processes. You see, the Lord doesn’t set people up to fail. He would get no glory from that. Instead, He gives us what we need to be successful in what He has called us to do.

Fourth, God promises us success. You may argue, “Well, if God has promised me success, then somewhere along the way, He messed up.” No, He hasn’t. However, if we’re struggling to find any areas of accomplishment in our lives, it may be that we ourselves have gotten off course. 

What did the Lord tell Joshua? He told him to be strong and courageous, to obey His Word, and to be careful to keep His commandments. And the result? “For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success” (Josh. 1:7-8). Do you see? The formula for success is right there in black and white in the pages of Scripture.

Conditions for Success

Now, here is what we must not miss: God may have planned, provided, equipped, and promised, but our personal success has some conditions. After all, the Lord will not make us victorious in spite of ourselves! 

Therefore, we must pay attention to three specific conditions: We are to . . .

• Establish God-given goals. Search the Lord’s will and set measurable goals for what He wants you to accomplish. His will does not happen by accident; we must make a decision to seek after Him.
• Walk obediently before the Father in the process of achieving these goals. How can we expect God to help us succeed in life when we choose to disobey the principles of His Word? Scripture tells us how to live; we are to abide by its guidelines as we pursue our goals.
• Rely fully upon the Holy Spirit as we practice godly principles of success. We cannot go about the Christian life as though we were acting in a one-man show. We can be successful in Christ only when we submit completely to the leading, direction, and empowerment of God’s Spirit.

The Lord is intimately concerned with our success. Since He determines our goals and equips us to meet them, we should never be too ashamed to claim the blessings, He gives for that purpose.

Therefore, we must often stop to take an honest look at how we define success, and then measure our understanding against Scripture. 

There is truly only one way we’ll ever achieve success—God’s way.

Day 7 Lenten Journal/Journey

How can God use a person such as me? 

Do I realize that I am an example, a mentor, to others? 

Your spouse, your children, your friends, your co-workers, your neighbors, and your community all watch you. 

What kind of example do you set?

Do you support them in Christian living and succeeding in? 

At one time or another, we have all asked these questions.

Think God can’t or won’t use you? Think again. God uses ordinary people, His children, to accomplish His will every day.

Throughout the Bible, God uses ordinary people, His children to do extraordinary things. 

Moses had killed an Egyptian who was beating one of His people. 

Peter was a fisherman. Paul was known for his horrible persecution of believers of Jesus Christ, before his conversion. 

David was a shepherd. 

Ruth, Noah, Isaac, Job, James, etc were all ordinary people, God's children, used to make meaningful impacts in the lives of others.

Think of Pope Paul. He is just an ordinary man that God has used to do extraordinary things, reaching millions of people.

We may not all be called to have an impact that will reach thousands of people today, but you will have a meaningful impact on those in our lives and they will have an impact on others.

You are an example of Christian living, whether you want to be or not – you have an influence on others. All the lives we each touch will watch our example.

If you believe God, if you submit to His will, if you are obedient to His Word, if you care for and have compassion for His children, stand back and watch the work of the Lord through you and through those you have been an example for.

Day 7 of Lent

Let us welcome Lent. In so doing, we will receive the much needed grace it offers and be made ready to celebrate the Resurrection.

 

"Filled with the Holy Spirit, Jesus returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the desert for forty days, to be tempted by the devil." (Luke 4:1)  "The truth is that only in the mystery of the incarnate Word does the mystery of man take on light." (Gaudium et Spes, # 22, Second Vatican Council) When I was a young man in College I had a priest friend who I now recall every time we begin the Forty Day Observance of Lent. About a week before Ash Wednesday he would say, "I am looking forward to Lent." The comment would perplex me greatly. In fact, I was dreading Lent, thinking it to be an onerous time with a lot of external practices which I did not really understand.
In my 20 year old mind, mistakenly thinking as most 20 year olds do  that I knew everything, I would dismiss the comment from my priest friend as some sort of "weird piety."  Now, decades later, I find myself joined with my old friend, seeing the wisdom of his well formed piety. I have only just begun to unpack the great potential of Lenten practice and observance as I welcome this remedial season of grace. God does not need Lent, we do.
This ancient practice of setting aside 40 days in order to enter - in Jesus - into the desert places in our own daily lives and confront the temptations and struggles we face is a gift. It comes from the Lord and is offered through the Church who is our mother. The Church as mother and teacher knows just what we need. We all know the truth and need to be honest, particlualry so during Lent. We all struggle with disordered appetites and unconverted ways of thinking and living.

We also demonstrate in our daily lives a lack of charity in our relationships with others. We have developed unhealthy habits which cause us untold sadness and impede our progress in virtue. None of these set us free or help us to flourish as human persons. They are the bad fruit of sin. The Desert of Lent is where we learn to conquer in the One who both shows us the Way and is Himself the Way.
Lent is a gift given to us by the Lord, but we have to unwrap it and apply its remedial and healing prescriptions. The Lord in whom we now live through Baptism, is Risen from the Dead. He is walking through time now, in his Body, the Church. He wants to save us and set us free as we live our lives in that new world which is the seed of the Kingdom to come. However, as another priest friend of recent acquaintance regularly reminds his parish, "Lent  won´t work unless you work it!"
On this First Sunday of Lent, our priests lead us at the Liturgy with this profoundly insightful opening prayer: "Father, through our observance of Lent, help us to understand the meaning of your Son´s death and Resurrection, and teach us to reflect it in our lives."  That is what can happen during these 40 days. Lent invites us to journey in Jesus, into the Desert. It is there, in that pace of struggle, the field of engagement, where we can learn the root causes of our challenges and be equipped with the weapons of our warfare to fight what the Scriptures and Tradition refer to as the "world, the flesh and the devil."
The "world" in this meaning is NOT referring to the created order. Creation is good and given to us as a gift. Rather, the "world" refers to the system which has squeezed the primacy of the Creator out of daily life. When we succumb to its seduction we give ourselves over to the idolatry of self. The "flesh" is not our body - which God fashioned and which will be raised from the dead, made glorious by the Resurrection. Remember, the Word became flesh and was raised BODILY from the grave. Jesus was the "first fruits" and we too will be raised in Him. Rather, the "flesh" refers to the disordered appetites which are one of the bad effects of sin at work within us. The "devil" is not some figment of our imagination, but a malevolent fallen angel who, just as He tempted our first parents and tempted the Lord, now tempts us. These 40 Days of Lent are a classroom in which we learn to conquer the "world the flesh and the devil" so as to live differently, beginning now.
The Author of the letter to the Hebrews reminds us, "…we have not a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin."  (Heb. 4:15) Jesus, the Word made flesh is our Model. The temptations He engages in the desert are the prototype of all of the challenges we face as we respond to the continuing call to conversion. After all, the Christian vocation is just that - a continuing call to conversion. We respond the Lord´s invitation.
The first temptation Jesus faced was to His identity. After all, he IS the Son of God! We, through our Baptism, have 

also now become Sons (and daughters) of the Father in Him. The next temptation was to idolatry. We regularly commit the horrid sin of idolatry, succumbing to its lies almost on a daily basis. Like the Christians in ancient Rome, we live in an age which has "exchanged the truth of God for a lie, worshipping created things rather than the Creator. (Rom. 1:25) Finally, there was the subtle but deadly temptation to violate integrity, to use the gifts and power of God improperly and put the Lord to the test. How clearly this poisonous serpent lurks in our daily life!

In each of these encounters with the Tempter, Jesus shows us the method by confronting the lies of the truth of God´s Word. He is the Living Word, and we, through our Baptism, now live our lives in Him.That is why I say we enter the desert IN Him. We do this by living within the communion of the Church which is His Risen Body on earth. The Church is not some-thing but Some - One. There, in the Lord, we find the resources we need to grow in holiness and struggle against the lingering effects of sin. There we embark on the journey of holiness, becoming what the Scriptures call "perfected´ or completed in Jesus Christ. His Divine Life (Grace) is mediated to us through the Sacraments, in the Living word and the communion of love in which we now live.
We are invited during these 40 days to take every gift, every grace, offered to us. We are invited to learn to wield the weapons of prayer, fasting and almsgiving. By these practices we grow in freedom by putting away the "old man/woman" and putting on the "new man/woman", created anew in Jesus. It is Jesus in his Sacred Humanity who fully reveals that new man. He is the model, showing us the method. However, in His Divinity He is Himself the Means. In Him we are redeemed. We are also capacitated to grow in holiness and virtue by overcoming temptation. Through His Saving Life, Death and Resurrection, he makes it possible for us to live new lives, in Him - beginning now and leading into eternity.
Too often we forget that sin is a wrong choice, an "abuse of freedom" (See, Catechism of the Catholic Church # 1731- 1739, 386 – 402). We were created in the Image of God and at the very core; the heart of that Image is the capacity to freely choose to respond to his loving invitation to communion with Him. From the first sin, the original sin, onwards, every sin is an abuse of that freedom and leads us into slavery. However, as the Apostle Paul reminds the Galatians, "It was for freedom that Christ sets us free"! (Gal. 5:1) Our freedom has been fractured and the Cross is the splint which, when applied in our daily lives, restores our capacity to live freely!
In his homily on Ash Wednesday 2010, Pope Benedict XVI sketched for the faithful the portrait of this Holy Season as he reflected on the 40 Days that Jesus spent in the desert on our behalf:
"That long time of silence and fasting for him was a complete abandonment to the Father and to His plan of love. Going into the desert meant voluntarily exposing himself to the enemy's attacks, to temptation…entering into battle with him on the open field, defying him without any weapon other than his infinite trust in the Father's omnipotent love.
"Adam was expelled from the earthly paradise, the symbol of communion with God.... Now, in order to return to that communion and thus to eternal life we must pass through the desert, the test of faith. Not alone but with Jesus who proceeds us and who has already conquered in the fight against the spirit of evil. This is the meaning of Lent, the liturgical time that, each year, invites us to renew our decision to follow Christ on the path of humility in order to participate in his victory over sin and death".
Let us choose to enter now into that open field. Let us enter into the desert, in Jesus. In Him we now live our lives. Let us welcome Lent by embracing its way of voluntary sacrifice, of fasting, prayer and almsgiving. In so doing, we will receive the much needed grace it offers and be made ready to celebrate in greater freedom the Victory Feast of the Resurrection.

Day 6 Lenten Journal/Journey

It seems has if we have been plagued with differences with others lately?

Perhaps a conflict with a family member, a close friend, a friend, a neighbor, a fellow employee, or a church member has left a hole in your heart.

Perhaps you haven't experienced the conflict yet, but you see one looming on the horizon; threatening like a severe storm, you know it seeks to unleash havoc upon all the relationships around you.

You would like for there to be peace and good will, but the more you try to avoid the conflict, the more rapidly the conflict heats up or persists. There are differences amongst you that you cannot deny or overlook. Sooner or later you will have to deal with head on. What will you do?

Abram gives us some insight as to how to deal with differences with others. From this passage, he was dealing with a close family member, which is not unlike our family or close friends.

The conflict may not have been between them personally, but it threatened to do so as the herdsmen of Lot and Abram began to fall into competitive rivalries which eroded into bitter disputes between them over the best pasture lands and watering holes from which they fed and watered their livestock. Ironically, this began to happen because God had blessed the herds of both owners. Yet what had been a blessing to Lot and Abram soon became the focus of a conflict that bubbled just below the surface of their relationship. What would they do?

Abram, the senior and perhaps most spiritual if not the wisest of the two took the initiative to speak to Lot and clear the air between them. He called a meeting between them to determine the future of their corporation. It is clear that Abram valued the relationship of Lot far more than any potential profits he might have reaped. So Abram proposed the breakup of their corporation, and allowed Lot to have the opportunity of the first choice between them. "Is not the whole land before you?" Abram asked, "If you go to the right I will go to the left," etc. Lot took Abram up on the offer, and made the first choice and chose what he perceived to be the best that was out in front of him. This was a risky venture, because Abram stood to lose a lot of money in the breakup. But God spoke to his heart and assured him this would not happen. Instead, Abram gained far more than he might have lost in the deal. Following this meeting, Abram went back to Mamre and built an altar of worship to the Lord confident that He would look after Abram's interests, he offered a sacrificial offering there.

Often for the sake of peace we try to forestall most conflicts, especially when we sense they might not be resolved peacefully. However, Abram knew that to delay a conflict is usually to make it worse until the issues are brought out upon the table. Wisely, Abram sought to diffuse the conflict and proposed that they part company before a bitter battle ensued. We must also be prepared to lose money or our pride as we offer the terms of peace- as Abram was. Still, Abram would have lost far more than money had he allowed the conflict to continue. It certainly would have cost Abram the relationship of Lot. The simmering conflict might have boiled over into bloodshed. No one wanted something like that to happen. God has called us to peace.

How do you deal with differences? What threatens the harmony in your relationships today? Would you be the one that takes the high ground and defer to the other even though you know in your heart it is not fair? If you have, you have not only done the right thing, but you have also trusted God for the results and left the dealings in His control. Can you do this today?

Prayer: Dear God, I see conflict looming on the horizon. I don't want it to come, but there seems to be nothing I can do about it. Help me to preserve the good will and love of the relationship within the storm as much as is possible for me to do so that I may continue to glorify You.

Day 6 of Lent

"Dealing With Differences" Genesis 13:1-18

1 So Abram went up from Egypt to the Negev, with his wife and everything he had, and Lot went with him. 2 Abram had become very wealthy in livestock and in silver and gold.

3 From the Negev he went from place to place until he came to Bethel, to the place between Bethel and Ai where his tent had been earlier 4 and where he had first built an altar. There Abram called on the name of the LORD.

5 Now Lot, who was moving about with Abram, also had flocks and herds and tents. 6 But the land could not support them while they stayed together, for their possessions were so great that they were not able to stay together. 7 And quarreling arose between Abram's herdsmen and the herdsmen of Lot. The Canaanites and Perizzites were also living in the land at that time.

8 So Abram said to Lot, "Let's not have any quarreling between you and me, or between your herdsmen and mine, for we are brothers. 9 Is not the whole land before you? Let's part company. If you go to the left, I'll go to the right; if you go to the right, I'll go to the left."

10 Lot looked up and saw that the whole plain of the Jordan was well watered, like the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt, toward Zoar. (This was before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.)

11 So Lot chose for himself the whole plain of the Jordan and set out toward the east. The two men parted company: 12 Abram lived in the land of Canaan, while Lot lived among the cities of the plain and pitched his tents near Sodom. 13 Now the men of Sodom were wicked and were sinning greatly against the LORD.

14 The LORD said to Abram after Lot had parted from him, "Lift up your eyes from where you are and look north and south, east and west. 15 All the land that you see I will give to you and your offspring [a] forever. 16 I will make your offspring like the dust of the earth, so that if anyone could count the dust, then your offspring could be counted. 17 Go, walk through the length and breadth of the land, for I am giving it to you."

18 So Abram moved his tents and went to live near the great trees of Mamre at Hebron, where he built an altar to the LORD.

Day 5 Lenten Journal/Journey

As I write this, I am experiencing one of life's transitions: My son is leaving home to go off to war and immediate family members are moving back home. I am sitting in the middle watching all that is happening, flooded with my memories of how it used to be and filled with fearful anticipation of how it might be in the future.

My son is going and leaving me behind and soon family will be moving home I don't really even know anymore and they don't know me. I realized tonight how this all pertains to lent. There are three important words associated with Lent -- Transfiguration, transition, and transformation.

The transfigured Jesus stands in the gap between our human, time-bound reality and God’s eternal presence holding all things in being. He gives us a glimpse of the mystery and then gently leads us down the mountainside into the precarious transition from the NOW to the NOT YET.

But it is in this gap between the mountaintop of vision and the valley of hard work that Jesus comes alongside us in companionship. It is in the gap between the unknown possibility that still lies beyond us and the familiar we once cherished that we are stretched. It is in the season between the ripening and the letting go that the real harvest happens.

What happened to Jesus and his disciples on the mountain of transfiguration happens to us during life's transitions, even if in less dramatic ways. Gradually, though often not without pain, each of us grows into the transformation to which we are being called.

It is not easy to not despair in times of change or growth but we are all aware that despair is not of God it is evil and it always makes life more difficult and results needed longer to obtain.

We have to trust God in these times. If we do we might just discover that the Lord as been there with us during our transitions, especially when we are in pain and have not looked for Him to guide and comfort us.

Day 5 of Lent

We have begun the liturgical preparation for the renewal of our baptisms and the reception of those seeking entrance into the Church.

For Some Lent might be the season of prepositions as well.

Do I give up?

Do I give over?

Do I give to?

or

Do I give back?

Lent is about receiving again. Through the liturgical readings and prayers, we are reminded of how God has handed to us, the Eternal Son with a loving desire that we allow the Gift to be handed to us again and again.

We come to each Eucharist to be regathered and reminded of the conditions into which the Son was given and is now given to us. We prepare for our baptismal renewal by coming together as Church, as Christ’s Body and admit our condition to which we receive Him once more.

A large portion of the Book of Deuteronomy is dedicated to proper religious behavior within the Israelite community. For a very particular example, read verses eleven and twelve from the previous chapter to the chapter from which we hear in today’s First Reading.

Here is a bit of the history behind the liturgical actions prescribed by Moses. In several verses from this book and from the Book of Leviticus, the role of the priests is to receive the first-fruits of the harvests. Then there is a communal prayer reflective of the reasons the fruits are handed over. God, through Moses, rescued Israel and each person individually, from the slavery of Egypt. God handed over the soil as a gift and the people were to multiply as well. The first-born of the family and of the flock were likewise dedicated in thanksgiving to the handing-over God. So too as a sign of dependence and gratitude for the soil, the people were to hand over some of what they had received. After this holy prayer of remembrance and surrender, the liturgical gesture will be to physically bow down in reverence of the presence of the One and Holy God.

We hear the familiar drama of Jesus’ being tempted by the devil. Jesus had received His being baptized according to Jewish custom. Again, as the rescued nation of Israel passed through water from slavery in a foreign land to freedom on their own holy soil, so each Jewish person would enter the Jordan river to then emerge cleansed from personal slavery and again stand renewed on the ground of freedom. During His being baptized, Jesus heard His identity as the Beloved One. He heard it, received it, and then began living it. What we hear is both the three temptations proffered by the devil and the three affirmations by Jesus of Who He knew Himself to be. So they are less temptations, but more a context for Jesus to begin showing up as Who He had heard He was.

The key word in the devil’s (evils) presentation is “if”. This conditional word moves the whole scene into the subjunctive, or “contrary to present fact” mood. Jesus remains “in the indicative”, “affirmed actual fact” mood. The devil wants to offer or hand over to Jesus what is already in and of Jesus. The devil quotes scripture but says “if you are” and Jesus replies with scripture but denies the “if”.

Much has been spoken and written about how we too are tempted with offerings of power, domination and possessions, as was Jesus. Those are worthy temptations about which to consider all right, but in this context of Lent, the more important reality to consider is how we are tempted to deny our relatives having been also baptized. Jesus lived out His “I am” because He had listened and believed He was the Beloved. We are preparing to enter again the water and grace of being reminded of who God in Christ has said in the indicative mood and spirit, who each of us really is.

Jesus could listen to all temptations, challenges, and invitations to disown Himself, to fall down, to be unreal, because He listened once and often, to the prayer of God over and within Him. Baptism, the Easter Sacrament, is our joining the Israelites as they entered often the river of remaindering. Jesus lived Who He had received from God. We follow Jesus in and out of the same waters of indicative identity.

We in our turn follow Him also in and out of the temptational fields of our lives. We forget so easily. If we don’t tell the stories of our pasts we will forget who we are. Young American Indian and Irish children, visit their aged relatives often and especially on Ritual Days and St. Patrick’s Day. They line in front of them and sing songs of their ethnic history accompanied with much sentiment. They would hear the old stories and be dressed in appropriate attires. They are reminded of Chiefs and Kings, royalty to both cultures! They learn who they are by what we heard and then lived. The only problem is that to much of the time the neighbors, kids on the playground, even teachers, do not treat these important events appropriately. Even parents occasionally forget lost in life's hustle and bustle. If we don’t celebrate our cultic and family histories, we will forget just how wonderful and blest they are.

Our forty days have begun. Our preparing to celebrate our identity has begun. We will listen to the stories, sing the songs, do the things which reveal to ourselves who we really are. We will receive again our name, our holiness. The real new life flows from the truth that we will do those things which reveal who we know ourselves to be. The people of Israel knew who God named them by their being baptized through the Exodus. They were to live in community doing the holy things of which offering the first fruits was a sign. We too have received our names through our being immersed in the baptismal waters of indicativity.

We are who God has claimed us to be and we are called to do those actions for each other appropriate to that name.

Day 4 Lenten Journal/Journey

Today was a terrible trying day both physically and emotionally. The physical part can easier be explained than the emotional troubles.

There is a storm coming in and the change in the pressure is creating a storm within my body. It would be easier to tell you what doesn't hurt than it would be to tell you what does hurt. And let me assure you I use the word hurt lightly, because by no means is this hurt minor or to be taken lightly. That I know how to deal with the best that I can or at least try to deal with.

The emotional storm and pain is not so easily dealt with and let me tell you that is saying something considering how high my pain levels are the last few days.

I am never going to understand people. You give them love, you are kind to them, you are compassionate towards them, you reach out to them in kind and they still cut your throat and leave you to bleed to death at the side of life's highway without so much as a glance back.

It is hard to not return their actions towards them, you know the eye for an eye stuff. But we all know that tit for tat has never solved on single problem within them or within you. I have reach the point that the only thing I do know to do is cry when it hurts to much and pray to get over it.

Yes I was tempted to lash back but I am learning the temptations of evil trying to tear me done. And I am learning to be ever so grateful that the Lords sits with me when it hurts so much and the tears roll straight out of my heart.

Day 4 of Lent

As Jesus hung on the cross, he uttered seven last words of great meaning to those who contemplate his passion and death.

For centuries these words have been built into various forms of devotion for the consideration and consolation of the Christian people. English Catholics of the late Middle Ages were especially devoted to this pious exercise and passed it on in prayer books.

Here is what Julian of Norwich has to say about this exercise:

Suddenly it came into my mind that I ought to wish for the second wound, that our Lord, of his gift and of his grace, would fill my body full with recollection and feeling of his blessed Passion, as I had prayed before, for I wished that his pains might be my pains, with compassion which would lead to longing for God. . . .

And at this suddenly I saw the red blood trickling down from under the crown, all hot, flowing freely and copiously, a living stream, just as it seemed to me that it was at the time when the crown of thorns was thrust down upon his blessed head. . . . With this sight of his blessed Passion and with his divinity, I saw that this was strength enough for me, yes, and for all living creatures who will be protected from all the devils from hell and from all spiritual enemies .

This devotion may be spread over a week, commemorating one of the seven last words each day, or it may be prayed as a whole devotion in a single day.

Go Here for the devotion:
http://www.loyolapress.com/the-seven-last-words-the-first-word.htm

The Seven Last Words: The First Word

As Jesus hung on the cross, he uttered seven last words of great meaning to those who contemplate his passion and death. The first word is based on Jesus' words in Luke 23:33-34.


Arrows in the bottom corner of the presentation allow you to move through the reflection at your own pace. You will need Flash to experience the devotion.

The First Word

Scripture quotations are from New Revised Standard Version Bible, copyright © 1989 National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

The text of this online reflection is from A Catholic Book of Hours and Other Devotions by William G. Storey.

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Use the links below to pray each devotion

Introduction

The First Word
The Second Word
The Third Word
The Fourth Word
The Fifth Word
The Sixth Word
The Seventh Word

Day 3 Lenten Journal/Journey

Today was definitely a day of the Lord and of evil messing.

My body with the nerve damage has become a human barometer and was screaming in pain when I woke up this morning after only about three hours sleep because another winter storm is coming in.

This make it very hard to be kind to anyone especially with these pain levels you become very self absorbed in the pain and your own coping skills. This all means anyone who distracts you is a frustrating distraction that wears on what little patients you have.

Today was not different except my mother was in a tenative state of mind from her Alzheimers. She was picking at me because she was confused and trying to orientate herself. At first I was impatient which was stressing not only myself but I noticed was stressing her and creating even more uncertainty and confusion.

It got so thick that you could almost feel the evil messing with us both in how each of us was dealing with the situation.

I stepped back, ask for help in dealing with the situation and coping with the pain. Instead of reacting negative to my mothers picking, I began joking with her about it and before long she was laughing, less stressed and no where near as confused as she was. As for myself I was a lot less stressed which help me cope better with the pain levels.

It really pays to step back, get silent, ask for help from the Lord. But most of all it helps to listen to what He is answering you in return. Evil tried, but praise God for always standing by your side.

Day 3 of Lent

Lent is a special time of prayer, penance, sacrifice and good works for those in need in preparation of the celebration of Easter.

The two elements which are especially characteristic of Lent -- the recalling of baptism or the preparation for it, and penance -- should be given greater emphasis in the liturgy and in liturgical catechesis.

It is by means of them that the Church prepares the faithful for the celebration of Easter, while they hear God's word more frequently and devote more time to prayer. The word Lent itself is derived from the Anglo-Saxon words lencten, meaning "Spring," and lenctentid, which literally means not only "Springtide" but also was the word for "March," the month in which the majority of Lent falls.

Day 2 Lenten Journal/Journey

Today the Lord was in my life in a huge way. I don't sleep much, pain doesn't allow me to stay asleep for any real length of time, we are usually talking between two and four hours of sleep a day. I get to a point that I am completely exhausted and lifting my head off my pillow usually wipes me out.

Although I was having some severe pain levels today, I was blessed to be able to sleep off and on almost all day. I got a lot more rest than I have had in several weeks now. Thank you Lord!

As for evil being in my life today. That happened when I needed someone to go to the store for me today and I couldn't find anyone willing to pick up my stuff for me. That kind of stuff makes me feel so helpless and to even despair in some cases depending on what it is that I need to have picked up. But today after beginning to despair (and that is evil at work) I sat down and let go of it and did my best to trust that it would work out instead of despairing. Then not long after that I got a phone call from someone who told me they couldn't help me earlier had some time freed that allowed him to help me out.

And another day has brought just a little more growth...you know the mustard seed size growth, but growth none the less, which is the blessing (And that is of the Lord).

Day 2 of Lent

VATICAN CITY (CNS)—People can get a glimpse of God in the world and in other people, but they must learn how to recognize it, Pope Benedict XVI said.

"There is a certain visibility of God in the church and in the world, and we must learn how to see it," the pope said April 29 at his weekly general audience in St. Peter's Square.

"God created humankind in his image, but this image is covered with so much dirt from sin that it is almost impossible to see," the pope said.

Pope Benedict's reflection on images of God in the world flowed from his main audience talk about the writings of St. Germanus, an 8th-century patriarch of Constantinople.

While Emperor Leo III was leading a campaign against the use of icons and other sacred images out of fear that devotion was turning into idolatry, St. Germanus defended their use in popular piety.

The pope said St. Germanus was known for his insistence that everything involved in the liturgy be beautiful, the pope said.

For the saint, the pope said, the beauty of the words used for preaching, and especially for prayers, "is as important in the liturgy as the beauty of the sacred building in which it takes place."

"The beauty of words and language, the beauty of the building and of the music must all match," the pope said.

While St. Germanus lived more than 1,200 years ago, the pope said that Christians today still could learn from him.

His first lesson, the pope said, is that "in Christ, the true image of God, we can contemplate the face of God and we can learn to be truly human images of God. Christ calls us to imitate him, to be like him so that in every person the face of God would shine through again."

Pope Benedict said it is true that "against idolatry and all the temptations of paganism, in the Ten Commandments God forbade the making of images of him. However, in Christ he became visible, in all the saints his face appears, and sacred images teach us to see God in the face of Christ, in the face of the saints (and) in the faces of all people."

The second thing St. Germanus taught was the importance of "celebrating the liturgy with an awareness of the presence of God, with beauty and dignity, that helps people see the splendor of God," the pope said.

The third lesson is "to love the Church," he said.

"Perhaps we human beings see mostly the sins and the negative, (don't get lost in the negatives of the church, or in the negatives and/or the doings of the people of the church) but with the assistance of faith, which can help us see well, even today we can rediscover divine beauty in the Church because it is in the Church that God makes himself present (and) offers himself to us," the pope said.

"In the holy Eucharist he remains present for adoration; in the Church God speaks to us, he walks with us as St. Germanus said; in the Church we receive the forgiveness of God and learn to forgive," Pope Benedict said.

The pope ended his audience by praying that God "would teach us to see, to see his presence and beauty in the Church, to see his presence in the world and to help us be transparent" so his light can shine through.

My Journal/Journey For Ash Wednesday

As I explained before I am going to Journal observing the ways the Lord is in my every day life.

A dear friend also said I should journal about how evil was in my life every day also. I think that is a wonderful idea, so we are more aware of how evil also affects our every day life, so I can become more aware of it's presence and they different ways evil is present to help me not only be aware of evil but to also help me not only reject evil in my life but to avoid it or to battle evil when needed.

Today was definitely a clear day for me how the Lord is present in my life and how evil was also present in my life.

As every one was leaving for Mass tonight and to receive there ashes together. Here I sat, with jealousy and bitterness welling up inside me because I was not going to be with my family and friends for this wondrous event.

As Mass was going on I prayed, (the Lord's presence) but my mind kept wondering to why the hell am I doing this. I am not part of this church anymore, I am not included, for all most my church family knows I have moved never to be heard from again. I live in to small of a town for them to think I am pushing up daisies. Then the jealousy hit, why is so and so there they aren't very nice and me who tries so hard isn't a thought in anyone's mind sitting here alone. Then the bitterness hit, there not including me so why am I including them. ( That my friends is pure evil at work)

Just when I was giving up, wasn't going to give it another thought, especially since I wasn't going to be blessed with ashes, to be apart of my community in Christ, the phone rings, and this gentle kind voice says, "Have you gotten your ashes today". Now that was the Lord sitting right next to me on my bed grinning at me as if to say, "why do you doubt me child".

Day one of this Journal/Journey and already God versed Evil and we all know who won....me....blessed when in no way did I deserve it. WOW!

Although Ash Wednesday is not a Catholic holy day of obligation, it is an important part of the season of Lent. The first clear evidence of Ash Wednesday is around 960, and in the 12th century people began using palm branches from the previous Palm Sunday for ashes.

Some of the largest crowds in the year will show up at mass to receive ashes on Ash Wednesday. Though this is not a holy day of obligation in our tradition, many people would not think of letting Ash Wednesday go by without a trip to church to be marked with an ashen cross on their foreheads. Even people who seldom come to Church for the rest of the year may make a concerted effort to come for ashes.

I used to think it was funny that those who do not share our traditions often make a point of telling us that we have something on our foreheads, assuming we would want to wash it off, but many Catholics wear that smudge faithfully all day.

The readings assigned to Ash Wednesday highlight the call to conversion. The first reading from the prophet Joel is a clarion call to return to the Lord "with fasting, and weeping and mourning." Joel reminds us that our God is "gracious and merciful...slow to anger, rich in kindness and relenting in punishment," thus inviting us to trust in God's love as we seek to renew our life with God.

It is important to note that Joel does not call only for individual conversion. His appeal is to the whole people, so he commands: "Blow the trumpet in Zion, proclaim a fast, call an assembly; gather the people, notify the congregation; assemble the elders, gather the children and the infants at the breast." As we enter Lent, the season of renewal, we are united with all of God's people, for we all share the need for continued conversion and we are called to support one another on the journey. Imitating those who joined the Order of Penitents in ages past, we all become a community of penitents seeking to grow closer to God through repentance and renewal.

St. Paul implores us in the second reading to "be reconciled to God." "Now," he insists, "is a very acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation." The time to return to the Lord is now, this holy season, this very day.

The Gospel for Ash Wednesday gives us good advice on how we are to act during Lent. Jesus speaks of the three main disciplines of the season: giving alms, praying and fasting. All of these spiritual activities, Jesus teaches us, are to be done without any desire for recognition by others. The point is not that we should only pray alone and not in community, for example, but that we should not pray in order to be seen as holy. The same is true of fasting and works of charity; they do not need to be hidden but they are to be done out of love of God and neighbor, not in order to be seen by others.

There is a certain irony that we use this Gospel, which tells us to wash our faces so that we do not appear to be doing penance on the day that we go around with "dirt" on our foreheads. This is just another way Jesus is telling us not to perform religious acts for public recognition. We don't wear the ashes to proclaim our holiness but to acknowledge that we are a community of sinners in need of repentance and renewal.

The call to continuing conversion reflected in the readings today is also the message of the ashes. We move through Lent from ashes to the baptismal font. We dirty our faces on Ash Wednesday and are cleansed in the waters of the font.

More profoundly, we embrace the need to die to sin and selfishness at the beginning of Lent so that we can come to fuller life in the Risen One at Easter.

When we receive ashes on our foreheads, we remember who we are. We remember that we are creatures of the earth ("Remember that you are dust"). We remember that we are mortal beings ("and to dust you will return"). We remember that we are baptized. We remember that we are people on a journey of conversion ("Turn away from sin and be faithful to the gospel"). We remember that we are members of the body of Christ (and that smudge on our foreheads will proclaim that identity to others, too).

Renewing our sense of who we really are before God is the core of the Lenten experience. It is so easy to forget, and thus we fall into habits of sin, ways of thinking, things we do to others or more important don't do for others and ways of living that are completely contrary to God's will.

In this we are like the Ninevites in the story of Jonah. It was "their wickedness" that caused God to send Jonah to preach to them. Jonah resisted that mission and found himself in deep water. Rescued by a large fish, Jonah finally did God's bidding and began to preach in Nineveh. His preaching obviously fell on open ears and hearts, for in one day he prompted the conversion of the whole city.

From the very beginning of Lent, God's word calls us to conversion. If we open our ears and hearts to that word, we will be like the Ninevites not only in their sinfulness but also in their conversion to the Lord. That, simply put, is the point of Ash Wednesday!

How to begin?

I wanted to keep a journal through Lent this year. I wanted to write each night how I had seen the Lord in my life each day. I did this once before for lent and it was a wonderful positive experience for me and it made me a lot more aware of ways the Lord was in my life daily that I wasn't even aware of.

But I wanted to find a way to journal in a different way, a new way, so it would be a new experience. I got to talking to some ladies about it today on Facebook and I confirmed that I should blog/journal to share it what I was experiencing and to experience other people's perspectives. What a learning experience this could be for me and hopefully others as well.

Also one of the other ladies talked about the difficulties we all face in the world today and how hard it is to have fiath, to keep a faith let alone a strong faith. With all that is happening it is so very difficult to build up the faith you have, isn't that a good challenge for Lent?

Thank you Ladies, for the perspective that gave me the last boot of courage to blog and share my Lenten journey, instead of a simple private journey.